My Life On Gor

A New Understanding

It’s been three months* since I’ve been a slave. I arrived back in Port Kar from my travels last night. As Ben and his crew took care of the boat, I carried a small crate with me to the shop. Unpacking the contents, four very precious and rare jars of Hammerskog honey. These are my personal stash until I can arrange for more.

As I entered the shop a sense of peace came over me. Oh how wonderful to be home. My heart was healing. Slowly the thoughts of being his slave were going from my mind. The busier I kept myself, the less I thought about him. The busier I kept myself the more I healed. By day I was finding my place in this world, settling comfortably into my new life; independent, strong and growing financially successful once more. But at night, as I lay sleeplessly in my bed letting the ships rocking sooth my battered soul, I would think of him. My hands running through his blue hair, how I would writhe helplessly against him during the passion-filled nights he called me “mine,” the feel of his lips as they pressed against mine. At night the familiar longing was at its strongest.

As I fight to hide the slave desires I’d so freely given into just a short time ago, as they would most definitely end me back in a collar, I begin to understand the angst of the Free Women I’d once loathed. I wasn’t the one who was a slave, they were. While there are certain freedoms they enjoy, the greatest pleasure they are denied.

I’m missing my home on Earth, something I hadn’t done for the four years as a slave. Life wasn’t like that for me there. I was able to be the strong successful career woman, while embracing and being open with my own sexual needs. The major difference is it was rare to find a man who was strong enough to invoke that in me. I was the one taking what I wanted when I really wanted someone to take it from me. If only these two worlds and their cultures could blend.

Hearing some rustling behind me I’m lured from my thoughts back to reality. Looking towards the door way, my heart is caught in my throat at the sight of May. Biting my lower lip, fighting back the mix of anger and tears I ask “Tal May,” looking past her, “Is he here with you?”

Shaking her blue locks, the same striking color as his, my heart races wondering, “No, he’s sleeping off a drinking binge on the boat. It’ll be a few days before he’s moving again.”

I watch her eyes widen as she looks at the sweets in the shop, knowing my former chain sister so well, I turn to her, “Help yourself May, on the house.”

As she stammers “Oh no, I got the money Master gave me in this pouch,” we are interrupted by a familiar voice, laughing as he tsks at me “Lady Beth you’re going to make me worry about you giving away your potential profits, listen to the girl and take the coin.”

Fighting the urge to leap at him, hugging him close, my eyes shinning at the sight of my good friend. Oh how I missed him during my journey. “DARK!,” I exclaim. “Well I suppose I can take more of that bastards coin and add it to what he left me in the bank,” and with a slow smile curling my lips “And add that to the coin that I made on my journey.”

Rambling on I share with him the contracts I picked up from Kieran Ely and about the Hammerskog honey, as well as about meeting Nero, the farmer outside of Port Kar earlier in the day. As we talked about my next journey he passed some information to my shipwright Ben to include as he plans our next voyage. We’ll be heading North again to Hammerskog to finalize the contract for the honey and the sale of my candy in their bakery, then over to Skjern to possibly set up another trade agreement, down to Axes Fjord, to Dark’s holdings in the south to pick up some livestock for the farmer, up to Tancred’s Landing and back to Port Kar. I initially thought to add Tyros for cherries, but Dark informed me that magically every third shipment of cherries that leaves there docks some how ends up in Port Kar, to which he informed me that I may use as many as I would like. I think my heart did a little dance at the thought of pure profit from that idea.

Curiosity getting the better of Dark, he orders May to move her camisk aside. It turns out he wanted to see if her hair on her head matched her hair on her heat. Disappointed there is not there on May, she keeps it bald as a baby’s backside.

As I watch both of their desires growing I can’t help but feel that familiar twinge stirring in my belly. Frustrated that I can’t embrace it, I take a peppermint stick from the jar and begin sucking hard on the candy as I excuse myself to check on things on my ship. On the way out the door, I glare jealously at May, giving her a light kick as I pass by.

Yup, I definitely have a new understanding to the torment of the Gorean Free Woman.

* Note: For RP purposes to create a sense of realism Beth has been released for three months, but in RL time only a week. The power of the SL teleport is a blessing and a curse.